Dear Professor:
I apologize that I could not come to class but
I had a migraine
Lymphnoids en-flamed
My flight was delayed
I had the flu
The longest cold on record
I thought I had mono because I could barely get out of bed
My grandmother’s dead
Again
This weekend was nothing short of a disaster
My sister, she’s very ill
My uncle’s not well
This was not in my plan
Please understand
I’ve had ovarian problems, staph infection, strep throat
Do you want a doctor’s note?
I have been up for 36 hours straight
The reason I’m late is that I just found out I’m pregnant!
I know you don’t want to hear my sob story
Who's writing this?
- jennifer
- I read a ton. I like to talk about and write about books. I love literary fiction, narrative nonfiction, and the occasional police procedural. I also like pigs and ice cream and smart conversation.
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6 comments:
ha! that brightens my day. but you left off "I got really drunk last night," and "I had tickets to a concert." (sadly, i've heard both of these.)
Your students are just more honest! And more fun. I just get long paragraphs about "lymphnoids."
This semester, my favorite so far has been, "I was suddenly in a rural part of Romania for two weeks. I only now just returned."
Oooh! That's a good one. When your daughter gets a bit older, you'll be forced to start reading the Magic Treehouse books. I think the characters in one of those books suddenly found themselves in Romania, too (Their treehouse magically delivers the kids to far-off places). Maybe your student is really a plagiarist!
Add to "I just found out I'm pregnant" ... "and I have to decide if I'm going to have an abortion..."
You have me beat there. But I did have a student tell me all about the infection she received from her Brazilian wax (and brought a note from her gynecologist as evidence).
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