So we set out two plates of cookies, one for the Big Elf and one for the Fairy. Santa got a glass of milk, but the Tooth Fairy did not, apparently because fairies don't get thirsty. Coincidentally, I was just reading about a Tooth Fairy/Santa Claus encounter. In Father Knows Less Or "Can I Cook My Sister?": One Dad's Quest to Answer His Son's Most Baffling Questions, Wendell Jamieson tells the story of the unfortunate loss of his sister's tooth on Christmas Eve. When his sister awoke to find her tooth untouched under her pillow in the morning, she asked why the Tooth Fairy did not show up as planned. Her father told her that the Fairy did not forget-- it's just that she had been run over by Santa's sleigh. Apparently, that did not go over well. (Lucky for us, the Tooth Fairy was watching where she was going and managed to slip a little cash under Green's giant melon head).
Now, I know that every family that celebrates Christmas has its own little traditions. Some people open gifts on Christmas Eve, while some wait until Christmas day. In my family, we manage to do both. You see, my MOTHER wakes us up before the crack of dawn to open gifts, making the whole enterprise over and done with before the sun even rises. This year was no exception, and she broke a cardinal rule of parenthood which is YOU NEVER WAKE A SLEEPING CHILD.
Imagine our surprise when we heard the screech and bleat of a marching, singing toy Santa Claus at 5:20 a.m. It did not turn off until we were all out in the living room with our hands covering our ears. Fortunately, the holiday joy of small children outshines the outrage that comes from being violently uprooted from sleep.
The kids got what they wanted from Santa, and so did I. I have been coveting those cute little Flip video cameras that you can carry in your pocket, and one was waiting for me under the tree. We have a camcorder, but it's rare that I have it with me to capture the excitement of my everyday life. So be warned -- I'm going to try to get video up here, so you're likely to be exposed to a LIVE ACTION version of me cleaning the garage.
Now THAT is something to look forward to!
8 comments:
So how come you look photoshopped in? Are you really a member of this family or is this some sort of wild, Nabakovian delusion?
Oh, and Merry Merry and Happy Happy.
Well, I wasn't photoshopped in, but I did make a very dark photo lighter using photoshop. I like the idea of being a delusion, however.
Merry, merry, happy,happy to you, too.
Well, let's check with the man himself. I'll quote right from the book (Transparent Things, full of this stuff about illusions), mindful of falling again into that imprecision thing (the whole Ricky/Mickey bit):
Another thing we are not supposed to do is to explain the inexplicable. Men have learned to live with a black burden, a huge aching hump: the supposition that "reality" may be only a "dream." How much more dreadful it would be if the very awareness of your being aware of reality's dreamlike nature were also a dream, a built-in hallucination! One should bear in mind, however, that there is no mirage without a vanishing point, just as there is no lake without a closed circle of reliable land.
Doesn't that tidy up the whole reality/illusion thing? "Reliable land" indeed! Then again, my attitude on unsolvable mysteries may be one key reason for that transfer from English to Chemistry I made 21 years ago, this month. Ack. Also the whole talent thing.
I think it's more of a halo anyway.
I wonder how long until Blue's tooth drops? Some odious Bluetooth pun is lurking in that sentence somewhere.
But anyway. A late Merry Christmas and Happy New Year (I prefer the unambitious Hawaiian equivalent "hau'oli makahiki hou," which essentially means "joyful annual repeat") to all.
Scott and Joey,
One of the things I love about Northwestern grads is our ability to take the mundane (I had to wake up early but got a cool camera) and take it to a greater, more philosophical level (delusions/illusions/huge aching humps). You guys rock!
We are but epiphytes.
"We are but epiphytes."
Certainly there's not better description of the English Professor.
But hats flippin' off to PQ for whipping out Vlad with the perfect quote. Either you've got that filed away in the fertile garden of your mind (thank you Orhan Pamuk) or you have way too much time on your hands.
I'll choose to believe the former.
I heard that Blue and Green each got a trumpet for Christmas from a wonderful relative. What did you do to deserve that?
Luckily I was up already when my son woke up around 7AM running around the house filled with the joy that Santa did indeed come even after a 7 year old cousin tried to tell him on Christmas eve that Santa didn't exist! Yikes.
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